“Orr shook his head. He looked apprehensive, but he offered no objection. There was an acceptant, passive quality about him that seemed feminine, or even childish. Haber recognized in himself a protective/bullying reaction towards this physically slight and compliant man. To dominate, to patronize him was so easy as to be almost irresistible.” (18)
It wasn’t until I read through this quotation for the third time that I noticed the interesting point it makes about the gender dynamics in the relationship between Haber and Orr. It is difficult not to notice the differences between the two men, but during most of the reading, I was thinking about these differences in terms of the power structure in their relationship. While this is undeniably an important factor (Haber uses the position of power he has as Orr’s therapist to coerce him into changing reality against his will) I feel that much about their relationship makes sense if viewed through the lens of gender and gender roles. Obviously, Haber fits quite well into the “alpha male” category: he has a very forceful personality, feels that he must always put himself in control of any situation, and easily identifies himself with the picture of the “big, healthy…bearing down at full gallop” horse on his wall (25.) Orr, on the other hand, does not have as many personality traits that we typically define as “male.” Even here he is described as “acceptant” and “passive,” and elsewhere in the novel as “meek, mild” and “a born victim” (42.) All of these are traits that are often attributed to (or imposed on) females. Even physically, Orr is much less masculine than Haber: “Hair like a little girl’s… soft white skin’ (42.) So from the beginning they are shown to the reader as opposites of one another in terms of gender roles, which seems to greatly influence the way in which they interact.
Haber, I think, feels that his own masculinity is threatened by Orr’s more effeminate characteristics. This “protective/bullying instinct” that he feels might be an ingrained reaction to the feminine qualities he sees in Orr. His initial response to Orr’s vulnerability is a protective instinct, possibly because of his position as his therapist, or because of the way he has been taught to treat those seemingly weaker than himself. Yet at the same time, alpha male that he is, Haber is disgusted that Orr does not fit with his idea of “masculine,” and this is where the bullying instinct comes from. It’s almost like children on the playground; a bigger, stronger child sees that the other one is smaller and weaker, and takes advantage of that. But at the same time, I think the situation goes beyond this playground scenario. I think Orr’s lack of masculinity threatens Haber, and that this is why Haber feels an irresistible need to patronize and dominate Orr—to show him where he is in the pecking order and to reaffirm Haber’s conviction of his own manhood. Also, in putting Orr in his place, so to speak, Haber is able to remain in control of their interactions, which is in fact the motive for almost all of his actions. Obviously theirs is too complex a relationship to be summed up in a single blog entry, but I think the above quotation brings us a step closer to understanding what has been motivating Haber in the first few chapters of this novel.
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